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feel like I should update :V
rn listening to Estelle for the first time, hadn't really checked her stuff out before and yep she's gr8. i love artists like this, like Janelle Monae and that type of work. but lol the way she pronounces words, the shape of her vowels... or anytime there's a speaking part and her voice goes down to its more normal range, every SINGLE time it's like WTF ITS GARNET??? [and yes i am listening to this because i'm gem trash, and ALSO I'M PRETTY DAMN SURE THAT SARDONYX IS VOICED BY JANELLE MONAE???? OH MG IM GONNA FLIP. and she and Estelle did a song together and IM LOVE]
IM SO HYPED for stevenbomb in like 1.5 days oh my god. u cannot stop me. especially since i've now seen Sardonyx [holy SHIT THAT FUSION DANCE WAS THE GAYEST THING ON EARTH IM IN LOVE pearl's gayness cannot be stopped]. this show is taking over my brain it's been YEARS since i've gotten into something so deeply haha. i love it. loooove iiiitttt
i haven't written about it but this has been like the POLAROID ADVENTURE WEEK!!! that's right my long awaited foray into instant film has finally happened. ive wanted this since i watched that documentary at the beach last year. and on wednesday bb was going around goodwill and picked up this camera for me for 6 bucks bc i begged him to LOL. when he sent me a photo i said OMG immediately i had to have it. it's in great shape. and then last night i went to urban outfitters for film [boooo only bc their film was on sale and nowhere else can u just go out in person and buy it instead of getting it shipped to you] and took my first polaroid photo, of Murphy.
then today!! i went to plaza midwood and wandered around until i found a photo subject. when i wandered down Central i found the King of Pops finally [omg coconut lemongrass popsicle for 3 bucks no regrets], and right there nearby was someone playing banjo and singing, busking. looked cute and queer and around my age. immediately knew i had to get a shot of this one hahah!!
so i approached her. my first time asking to photograph someone like this. her name was Beth and she played really well. only had been playing the banjo since january. she had all these nice tattoos and a little doodle of Finn on her wrist that her girlfriend had drawn on her earlier that day. she was homeless, just travelling through the country. was from Virginia, had seen almost every state except south dakota. [told me utah was great hahah im trash] so i took a photo of her with her banjo and case and sign, and she wanted to keep the photo. hahah. ugh i couldn't say no, she was too cute. and sang and played these folk songs, some covers and some she'd written herself. simple but so well. so i sat in the shade there with her [it was still so fucking hot] and hid my photo from light while it developed. because Impossible's film develops a lot slower and is a lot more sensitive to light than polaroid's was. gave her some change and talked about everything.
immediately had a tiny crush on her pfft. so i knew i was gonna have to let her keep the photo. so when it developed after 30 ish minutes, i gave it to her face down and had her turn it over while i took a second photo. and that one i kept, her genuine smile seeing herself in the first polaroid photo she'd seen in ages. it's a shame i didn't think to get a phone pic of the first one because it came out super well, but this one is almost even better in composition if not in development. [it developed in my pocket on the drive home LOL]
so yeah. suffice to say that i'm having a hell of a time with instant film just like i knew i would. no regrets whatsoever. and i'm definitely budgeting for packs of film to bring to utah with me LOL! oh yes. so many photos will be taken there. real tangible photos that you can hold and touch and show people and take with you anywhere.
every day is up and down for me mentally, lots of job stress lately again and i know i gotta find my way outta there. i can't stay like this anymore. but lol job hunting is so hard it's the worst. but you know what? this has definitely been the happiest year of my life too thus far. i feel more fulfilled than ever. starting to draw a lot more again [i started drawing gems and now i can't STOP HELP] and even coloring stuff and working on this tarot project, doing spiritual things and crafting, getting into hobbies i've wanted for a long time like instant film and retro gaming, getting into another super good relationship... moving out was so fucking good for me. it's still a struggle to stay afloat some days with anxiety and stress and sometimes depression but like. this is the happiest i've been in a long time and i'm so grateful.
rn listening to Estelle for the first time, hadn't really checked her stuff out before and yep she's gr8. i love artists like this, like Janelle Monae and that type of work. but lol the way she pronounces words, the shape of her vowels... or anytime there's a speaking part and her voice goes down to its more normal range, every SINGLE time it's like WTF ITS GARNET??? [and yes i am listening to this because i'm gem trash, and ALSO I'M PRETTY DAMN SURE THAT SARDONYX IS VOICED BY JANELLE MONAE???? OH MG IM GONNA FLIP. and she and Estelle did a song together and IM LOVE]
IM SO HYPED for stevenbomb in like 1.5 days oh my god. u cannot stop me. especially since i've now seen Sardonyx [holy SHIT THAT FUSION DANCE WAS THE GAYEST THING ON EARTH IM IN LOVE pearl's gayness cannot be stopped]. this show is taking over my brain it's been YEARS since i've gotten into something so deeply haha. i love it. loooove iiiitttt
i haven't written about it but this has been like the POLAROID ADVENTURE WEEK!!! that's right my long awaited foray into instant film has finally happened. ive wanted this since i watched that documentary at the beach last year. and on wednesday bb was going around goodwill and picked up this camera for me for 6 bucks bc i begged him to LOL. when he sent me a photo i said OMG immediately i had to have it. it's in great shape. and then last night i went to urban outfitters for film [boooo only bc their film was on sale and nowhere else can u just go out in person and buy it instead of getting it shipped to you] and took my first polaroid photo, of Murphy.
then today!! i went to plaza midwood and wandered around until i found a photo subject. when i wandered down Central i found the King of Pops finally [omg coconut lemongrass popsicle for 3 bucks no regrets], and right there nearby was someone playing banjo and singing, busking. looked cute and queer and around my age. immediately knew i had to get a shot of this one hahah!!
so i approached her. my first time asking to photograph someone like this. her name was Beth and she played really well. only had been playing the banjo since january. she had all these nice tattoos and a little doodle of Finn on her wrist that her girlfriend had drawn on her earlier that day. she was homeless, just travelling through the country. was from Virginia, had seen almost every state except south dakota. [told me utah was great hahah im trash] so i took a photo of her with her banjo and case and sign, and she wanted to keep the photo. hahah. ugh i couldn't say no, she was too cute. and sang and played these folk songs, some covers and some she'd written herself. simple but so well. so i sat in the shade there with her [it was still so fucking hot] and hid my photo from light while it developed. because Impossible's film develops a lot slower and is a lot more sensitive to light than polaroid's was. gave her some change and talked about everything.
immediately had a tiny crush on her pfft. so i knew i was gonna have to let her keep the photo. so when it developed after 30 ish minutes, i gave it to her face down and had her turn it over while i took a second photo. and that one i kept, her genuine smile seeing herself in the first polaroid photo she'd seen in ages. it's a shame i didn't think to get a phone pic of the first one because it came out super well, but this one is almost even better in composition if not in development. [it developed in my pocket on the drive home LOL]
so yeah. suffice to say that i'm having a hell of a time with instant film just like i knew i would. no regrets whatsoever. and i'm definitely budgeting for packs of film to bring to utah with me LOL! oh yes. so many photos will be taken there. real tangible photos that you can hold and touch and show people and take with you anywhere.
every day is up and down for me mentally, lots of job stress lately again and i know i gotta find my way outta there. i can't stay like this anymore. but lol job hunting is so hard it's the worst. but you know what? this has definitely been the happiest year of my life too thus far. i feel more fulfilled than ever. starting to draw a lot more again [i started drawing gems and now i can't STOP HELP] and even coloring stuff and working on this tarot project, doing spiritual things and crafting, getting into hobbies i've wanted for a long time like instant film and retro gaming, getting into another super good relationship... moving out was so fucking good for me. it's still a struggle to stay afloat some days with anxiety and stress and sometimes depression but like. this is the happiest i've been in a long time and i'm so grateful.